Ever wondered what coleslaw might taste like if it had less flavour, but cost ten times more? Wonder no more, Dubai Coleslaw has arrived.

Riding the coattails of Dubai Chocolate’s questionable success, Irish entrepreneur Sarah Collins, now based in Dubai, has unveiled her latest culinary export: a beige, egg-free coleslaw that costs Dh83 a tub and tastes, according to fans, like “slightly wet paper.”

“I realised there’s an endless market of people willing to jump on any trend without thinking it through,” Collins explained proudly. “And just like that, Dubai Coleslaw was born.”

Despite costing just 10 cents per 500 grams to produce, the luxury slaw is being sold at a jaw-dropping mark-up. “We arrived at the price after lengthy calculations involving market psychology and how easily people can be separated from their money,” Collins added.

The product, now being exported to rural Ireland at a rate of 40 tonnes a day, has already achieved cult status, thanks in no small part to influencer marketing.

“I saw someone nearly gag on TikTok while calling it the best Dh83 they’ve ever spent on raw cabbage,” said Christina, a satisfied customer. “So naturally, I had to have it.”

Another fan, Eoin, said, “It’s cost me too much to admit I hate it, so I just pretend it’s amazing. I think that’s the Dubai effect. Also, does anyone know if this stuff has mould toxins like that chocolate?”

With sales soaring and social media buzz growing, Dubai Coleslaw may well be the next overpriced trend no one asked for, but everyone seems to be buying.

(Source: waterfordwhispersnews.com)